I am in a vortex of obligation.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
