I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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