i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
