batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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