Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
YAS. BRING CRAB.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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