I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
it hurts more in the daytime
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
