that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
MIDGETS
????
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Randomize
