My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
