I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
