TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
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