What did we do last night that was yellow?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Randomize
