I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
