I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize
