took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize