is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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