if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
