Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
