Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
