I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
