ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
