Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
