so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Define "chronic" masturbator.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
