We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
