You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
