I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Boobs speak an international language.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
