FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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