I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize