It's like God shit irony all over that family
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize