I will die if light touches me.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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