I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
