Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize