i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
did you just send me my own nude
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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