break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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