I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
