Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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