your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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