do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
