He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
