I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
