i can't believe i had my finger in that
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
