Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
