you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
