If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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