oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
