I just saw a hot homeless man
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
