Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize