ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
