Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize