just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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