found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
